I recently returned from a trip to Oahu. 
The hotel I stayed in – the Queen Kapiolani – was nice, but it was situated such that the views were of the boring Pacific Ocean (my room) and Diamond Head (my friend’s room).
I spent most of my time marveling at the native Hawaiian flora and fauna, such as coconuts, ABC Stores (it’s tough to make out, but on the far right of the photo you can see a sign for another ABC Store), mopeds, and Japanese tourists.
One of the more frightening parts of the trip occurred when my party was attacked by boombox Injuns who stormed out of their solar powered teepees to dance the day away.
Fortunately, they were scared off by a liver spotted surfer and a group of Pale Skins.
The main reason I was on Oahu was to attend the wedding of two of my friends. It was a pleasant, short, ceremony and since some members of my party wore uncomfortable shoes it was very considerate of the church to make sure we had chairs with footrests.
At the wedding there were numerous opportunities for photography. Here we can see two brave hunters returning with their catches secure in their game bags. (On a side note, once we returned home, it was determined that the one the right took, on average, a photograph every five minutes during the entire trip.)
An unusual aspect of the ceremony, and one I was not accustomed to, was the contest for the best Elvis impersonator. Here is the winner mid “uh-huh.”
The levity carried over to the reception (held right on the beach) although certain members of the wedding party did have a little too much to drink.
The most sour moment came when a supertanker tried to crash the reception, but fortunately it was chased away by a surfer who happened to be in the area.
There was much more to my Hawaiian Odyssey, but that can wait till later. But until then, if you are thinking of going to Hawaii, there are a few things you should know. For example, on the one hand, the bugs are bad. (You don’t want to know what happened to the duck.)
But on the other hand, in Hawaii, even the statues get leid.
